We’re proud of our strong Consent Culture, which keeps our community safe and happy.
Only act on enthusiastic consent.
- At our events, consent is binary. You have enthusiastic consent or you do not have consent.
- Enthusiastic consent sounds like “Yes!” with an exclamation mark at the end.
- If you receive a response that is anything other than a clear and enthusiastic “yes!” we ask you to interpret that response as a no. (i.e., “Um, sure! Let me just go check in on my friend real quick…” That person may simply want to check on their friend, but it could be their way of not being comfortable saying no, and not wanting to offend.
Don’t be afraid to say “no.”
- It’s not rude; in fact, it’s respectful to be clear and honest!
- Practice saying “No, thank you” out loud. If find yourself caught off-guard by a request and are not sure what to say, arm yourself with that response.
- If you hear “no,” don’t ask multiple times, or ask for an explanation.
- Be respectful when saying “no;” be respectful when hearing “no.”
You can revoke consent at any time.
- Consent is always conditional on participant’s ability to revoke their consent. (i.e. If someone is gagged, negotiate a non-verbal safe word in advance.)
- We purposefully cultivate a safe environment where people can experiment. When you test your limits, sometimes you find them and you have to take a step back. Don’t be shy to revoke your consent if you need to.
Do not touch anyone without their explicit consent.
- Everyone is in complete control of when, where, and if they are touched.
- Even if you are just touching someone on the shoulder to get their attention, try to get their attention verbally first.
- This sounds pedantic, but our events are often a heightened sensory experience, and even a touch on the shoulder can feel more aggressive or intimate than intended.
- Even if someone said yes last time, don't assume. You should explicitly ask for their consent again before touching this time.
Drinking.
- If you cannot give or perceive consent, it’s too much.
- If the hosts think you’ve reached this point, we will pull you aside quietly and ask you to leave. You’re not in trouble, we’re keeping you safe.
- Everyone can have a little too much on accident. However, if this becomes a regular problem, you might not be invited back.
- All events are BYOB. We never provide alcohol.
No phones, no photographs.
- Phone and cameras must be completely out of sight in play spaces.
- We do not separate you from your phone, we just ask that you keep it out of sight.
- If you need to use your phone, please use a designated non-play space.
- The only exception is the hosts and occasionally volunteers. We will have our phones with us for safety and communication.
STDs / STIs.
- You MUST know your status before attending our private events. “Knowing your status” means being tested regularly and responsibly, not making assumptions.
- We keep an updated list of poly and kink-friendly testing locations in the Bay Area.
- If you have an STD or STI, you must disclose this to play partners before they take a risk they are unaware of. If you are not sure what to say, I recommend this resource: https://www.sotheycanknow.org/inform. That website covers how to tell a partner you have an STD or STI, which questions to anticipate, and how to anonymously inform partners whom you may be afraid to tell.
- No one will judge you here. You are among people who understand. But please keep us safe.
New Attendees.
- If you are attending your first party, you must arrive by 10pm, and you should be accompanied by a friend or date. All guests must have a ticket.
- All guests must have been approved by an Organ House host prior to their first event.
- You must to 21 or older to attend our events.